Ulysses & the Sirens
Herbert Draper

In a message earlier today, Beloved Rasa spoke of "new directives" for Rasa's MotherGod Army concerning matriarchy. Also earlier today, a reader who is a mature and thoughtful domme commented that she is beginning to feel the need to also surrender to dominant women, just like herself.

I don't have any standing to comment on dominance/submission issues per se, as I am not a part of the lifestyle. However, this question opened my heart to consider the question of matriarchy, and I also had an experience this afternoon which caused a sudden awakening for me about the need for matriarchy in the here-and-now.

A little background: I was raised in a rough-and-tumble household where girls were taught to be as tough and fearless as boys. I fit the demographic called "virile female", which is a woman who enjoys physical activities that are normally associated with men, and who assumes that women can do anything which a man can do.

I'm the sort of woman who would rather window shop at the hardware store than a clothing boutique. I have my own truck, my own shotgun, and my own power tools. I am a member of a target-shooting
club, a volunteer fire company, and a martial-arts dojo.

(I'm also an excellent cook, a master-level needlework teacher, and a professional jewelry designer.)

I was raised to be honest and assertive, and to live a simple and public-spirited life, without feeling limited by my gender in any way. I was taught that I am second to no-one, and stronger than most people.

This has given me a very rich and wonderful life, full of opportunities and friendships that I could never have pursued if I were limited by society's expectations of "nice women".

So with this background in mind, I'll describe today's experience, and the insight which was dropped upon me unexpectedly like a neutron bomb from heaven!


I was in the grocery store, picking through the fresh pasta baggies and wondering if I'd prefer to make a batch of noodles myself from scratch. Next to me at the dairy counter, a man and woman were arguing with each other. Actually, the man was shouting and the woman was quaking with fear. The conversation went something like this:

Man: "Let's get this cream for the recipe."

Woman: "The recipe calls for heavy cream, and I don't think it will come out right if we use the light cream."

Man: "I SAID, let's use THIS cream." (Moves threateningly toward woman.)

Woman: (Whispering) "But I don't want you to be disappointed..."

Man: "Shut up, you don't know s---!" Throws the cream into the cart with such violence that it begins to drip.

Me: (tapping man on shoulder) "Would you like to try using that tone of voice on ME, buddy?"

Man: (Mutters to himself and walks away.)

Woman: (Hisses) "How dare you talk to him like that?" (Turns and follows man.)



This is one of the dumb things that I used to do more often when I was young and strong and stupid. As any police officer can tell you, it's incredibly risky to get involved in a "domestic dispute". It had been a long time since I'd intervened in this way, and it surprised me that I'd done it now.

I retired to a quiet corner of the grocery store to think about what had just happened. Suddenly, I saw a bright flash of light and had a new insight literally PUSHED into my head via my crown chakra.

I've spent my life assuming that if I rejected gender assumptions and helped other people to do the same thing, we'd eventually have an egalitarian world with no gender-based discrimination. But the truth is that we can never reach a truly gender-neutral world without spending a lengthy amount of time as a matriarchy, in order to heal the specific damages caused by patriarchy.

It's impossible to go from patriarchy directly to equality between the sexes. Because the center-point can never be found until the pendulum swings toward the opposite direction first.

At this point in time, patriarchy is so ingrained that men and women are literally half-human. And because we have so completely stifled our unacceptable aspects, it is as if they are missing entirely. That's why men AND women fight so hard AGAINST feminism and equality; it's because they know that they are not fully equipped emotionally and mentally.

And so the abusive men and the dependent women must all work TOGETHER to put down the strong and independent women and the kind and compassionate men. Which is why police officers get injured so often in domestic abuse incidents, as the so-called aggressor and victim choose to join together to destroy the outside authority who attempts to change their sick interpersonal dynamics.


This insight struck me like a bolt of lightning. I mean that it really penetrated deep into my mind and heart, and I knew that it was TRUE in a way that went far beyond intellectual agreement. In that moment, I gained complete faith in the transforming power of matriarchy (and not of egalitarianism).

It also helped me to understand why I have found it so fulfilling to surrender to the Guru in the form of a strong and competent women who is similar to me in many ways (but more spiritually advanced). And why it has been a blessing that Rasa often presents herself and womankind in terms of dominance over men and patriarchy.

Until today, I couldn't quite accept that matriarchy (and not equality) is the solution that we need right now. But now I can see clearly that we have gone so far down the patriarchal path, that we need to counteract it via matriarchy.

Think of it as if it were a chemical reaction: If you have a beaker with a strong acid, you can never turn it into a neutral substance by diluting it with water. It will always remain an acid (though perhaps a weaker one than before). But to cross the line into being completely neutralized, we need to add an alkaline substance and not just water. We can't ever cancel patriarchy by simple kindness and egalitarianism, but we can give the antidote by promoting an equally strong matriarchal authority.

Patriarchal attitudes surround us everywhere. They are a part of every single interaction that we have every day. They are in every book, TV show, conversation, and web site that we encounter. Our world is so profoundly sick that we can't just sit around and encourage people to slowly change their attitudes.

This is an emergency; we need to take emergency measures. Just as a firefighter stops a fire by covering it with water, and just as a soldier stops the enemy troops from advancing by firing his weapon at them (just as they are firing their weapons at him), we must aggressively pursue the opposite actions which will stop patriarchy in its tracks.

Within matriarchy, there will be levels of authority and organization (just as in Rasa's Mother God Army now). Which means that we must learn the practice of surrendering ourselves EXCLUSIVELY to Mother God as She speaks through those women who are willing to actively pursue matriarchy.

Which is why a strong woman like me, can find inner peace and outer courage at the feet of Guru Rasa. And why this strange community of ours (which is such a target for goon-y derision because of our willingness to understand matriarchy in terms of physical dominance for those who find it helpful and inspiring, as well as spiritual surrender to an embodied Guru) is the hope for humanity.


Love and blessings!

January 15, 2006




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