I must declare, that one of the most irritating thing to me about people is the way they pray. A woman said to me,

"My husband is praying to God, that if he hits the lotto, he'll give God half."

The correct way to handle this is that you start giving God from the little you have - even if it's five or ten dollars a week (or even month) and trust in God to help you. This is called seed money or good faith money. Many people have almost nothing. But yet, they can take the TINIEST amount, like sacrificing a bottle of soda once a week, and give that dollar to God. This is prayer in action and this is righteous.

Let me tell you what will happen to that man if he hits the lotto. If God answers his prayer it will be only to punish him. People who pray this way NEVER KEEP THEIR PROMISE TO GOD. What would happen is he'd hit the lotto. He'd forget about God entirely, and concentrate on the money. All his relatives and "friends" would want it. They'd begin squabbling. He'd break up with family members, maybe even destroying the family, and he'd go off to Vegas for wine, women and song. He'd blow it soon. If it's the kind of money that keeps coming in periodically other things would happen. He now leaves his wife and marries a young broad who only wants the money. She gets what she can and takes off. Now he finds another young broad who does the same thing. This goes on and on. Maybe he gets addicted to drugs or alcohol because he can't take the pain of exploitation and rejection. As he gets old, there's no love in his life. The only people who maybe loved him he lost, because of the money. Finally, in the end, he really has nothing. Now he remembers God. If he repents, things will improve. Maybe he does not repent, and he's wasted his life and lied to God and will be judged for that. BUT GOD ANSWERED HIS PRAYERS TO PUNISH HIM BECAUSE THEY WERE EVIL PRAYERS AND HE GOT WHAT HE DESERVED.

As far as financial situation goes, a smart prayer is like this:

"Dear God, help me to manage with what I have, and be grateful for what I have. By your miracle power, provide for my family and myself, and let us also help others. From now on, although I cannot help others financially, I will put aside some of my time and energy to pray for others, and whenever I hear of someone in need I will do what I can with my time and energy and love, to help them. I KNOW you will help me, and I thank you for all you have done for me."

A prayer that God hears frequently goes like this:

"Oh God, make Judy love me. I am the best man, the real man of real love and Judy couldn't do better than me. MAKE HER SEE THAT. I love her IN TRUE LOVE. The other guys ONLY WANT HER BODY. God, MAKE JUDY LOVE ME AND I WILL HONOR YOU FOREVER AND WORSHIP YOU WITH ALL MY HEART."

This is a really SICKENING prayer and God will never answer it. The only way God might answer it, once again, is to punish him. If Judy is a real ballbuster and the bitch from Hell, God might just let him have her for his torture. Then he'll know what dumb prayers get him. The smart prayer on this subject would be:

"God, I really love Judy. But I'm not sure if this is the right thing for her and me. I think it is, but I bend to your will. I need love badly, and I trust in you to help me express my love and receive love in return. But if love is not forthcoming, if you do not chose me to have love of a woman, I bow to your will, and ask you to help me live my life the way you want it. If you want me to be lonely, let it be. Just let me remain in your friendship. Let me be sensitive to your great love at all times and fill me with love."

Another dumb prayer is the woman who wants a man for his money and doesn't mind breaking up a marriage to get it. Her prayer goes like this (if she prayed):

"Oh, God, let me have this man. I know he's married already, but I really want him and I know you understand. I've never had the wonderful things he can provide me, and I think I can make him happy. He says he isn't happy with his wife anyway, because she's getting old and doesn't like sex any more. God, I really want this and although society says breaking up a marriage is wrong, I know it isn't wrong in my heart because you want me to have what I want and need, and you want him to have what he wants and needs."

I know a woman who prayed exactly that prayer. Yes, she got the things she wanted, and for a while, she was "happy." But then came the PAYOFF FOR BAD PRAYER. He got tired of her and began berating her and putting her down and killing her self esteem. Then it was discovered he was A CHILD ABUSER. He had abused his own children and now abused his grandchildren. Her life fell apart. All the friends they had turned their backs on them, and his family now hated her, because it happened with the grandchildren while they were in her house. She lost all the things she prayed for: the money, the man, the good life, and ended up with nothing; just pulling herself up by her bootstraps. God answered her prayer to TEACH HER A LESSON.

Another bad prayer:

"God, take away my loneliness. Why do I always, and in all ways have to be alone and with no love and friends? Everyone betrays me and uses me and slanders me. Can't I have a happy love life and social life? Don't you want me to be happy?"

Here's how you have to pray smart:

"Oh, God, I am alone. I thank you for this loneliness because it brings me closer to you. I feel I am on the Cross with Our Lord, keeping Him company. I know how He felt when almost everyone betrayed Him and no one defended Him in His hour of need. Those who loved Him were powerless to stop His sufferings, as they were meant to be by Your Grace. Oh, Lord, let me be like Jesus. In my isolation, in my emptyness and worldly void, let me find you. I only want Jesus, and to be on the Cross with Him, to be crucified with Him. Let me rejoice in the thorns in my head because these thorns, the hurts to my mind and brain, bring me closer to Him. Let me rejoice in the nails in my hands and feet, so that I am helpless to get out of my pain. I know I'm with Him now. Let me rejoice in that spear that has been put through my heart, and I have been totally rejected and all my love has been spurned. I have been betrayed. But You have not left me, and never will. I have You and You are all I need. The ONE THING NECESSARY is You, oh God. Let me happy in all circumstances, at all times. Your grace is sufficient for me. Let me accept my handicaps. Let me accept my lack of abilities, my powerlessness, my frustration and all the things I feel in my flesh. Let it be alright that I am not loved. Just bring me closer to You, every day. Help me to be happy because I have You, and the fellowship of Heaven, and the Saints and Angels. Help me to serve you, oh God. Please let me leave the desires of the world and the flesh and just cling to you, closer and closer. I love you with all my heart, with all my mind, with all my strength. You are all I need, and I thank you for all you have given me and all you have done for me and for others. I praise your Holy Name, I praise you over and over and over. Let me live in You and for you now and always. Amen.


Rasa Von Werder, July 2004






I shall tell you the secret of my praying and also what pisses me off about most people's prayers. It is STUPID to say you don't pray because you don't need to pray, because EVERYONE needs to pray. You think, you fantasize that you're in such a great spiritual state that you just have to exist and everything good will come to you. You are destined, so you believe, for greatness. Alas, you fool. You have not TASTED life yet and you have not been TESTED enough. It's like the man who keeps walking and not looking and he has never fallen off a cliff. But if he walks long enough, he will fall off a cliff. Just because he hasn't, doesn't mean he won't. When you pray, you help prevent falling off that cliff. It is opening your eyes, it is seeing reality, and it is merging into reality. If you don't pray you are like the guy who lives with his wife for years, and he says he doesn't have to tell her he loves her because his being there is proof of that. But he doesn't do anything ESPECIALLY LOVING OR KIND OR SELF SACRIFICING, just living as usual. Naturally, if you do great heroic deeds all the time, like helping the poor and preaching on the street, constantly, that is a prayer. But just getting up in the morning, having your breakfast, going to work, coming home, eating dinner, watching tv and getting into bed with your spouse, that is not a prayer. That is ordinary ANIMAL EXISTENCE. A prayer is when you GIVE YOURSELF AND POUR YOURSELF OUT IN CHARITY EVERY DAY. So if your life with your spouse is HUM DRUM you are not living love, you are existing. So, when you stop and take time out and tell the spouse how much you love him/her, then it is a prayer. WE NEED TO PRAY DAILY BECAUSE WE ARE NOT DOING HEROIC ACTS OF CHARITY ALL DAY. BY PRAYING, WE THEN ENTER INTO THE REALM OF CHARITY, AND OPEN OURSELVES TO GOD, WHO IS CHARITY. The person who lives an ordinary life and says he doesn't need to pray is as dumb as a post. Whatever he has inside him that is good, he probably inherited by birth. His ancestors gave him the good that is in him, and he hasn't been tested by great evils yet. Prayer fortifies you against future evils. Prayer is also the primary way that you establish and maintain and increase your UNION WITH GOD. The person WHO DOES NOT PRAY, will sooner or later LOSE THE ABILITY TO PRAY, and will little by little be increasingly influenced by the world, the flesh and the devil, which are AT ALL TIMES tempting him to be absorbed in the lower states. So much for the person who doesn't pray - he is living on the edge of quicksand.

Now for those who DO pray, regularly, there are smart prayers and dumb prayers. Dumb people keep their minds on the world, the flesh and the devil and ask for same. They want the joys of the world, and the flesh, and never cease to ask God for them. God is a wish-fulfilling tree; Santa Claus. God is Great, therefore, God can and will give me all I want. Isn't prosperity good? Doesn't God want me to have happiness? And health, doesn't God want me healthy at all times? So then, let us begin. I shall pray for health, wealth, prosperity, happiness, blessings, all good things for myself and my family and friends. And oh, yes, I will ask that God make people stop hurting me and be respectful and kind to me. And my enemies? Ask God to smash them and make them have accidents and illnesses and all the evil they deserve. (These last prayers we usually keep secret and maybe just say we WISH they'd get paid back for what they did.)

Some of you are saying - is she kidding? What's WRONG with these kind of prayers - isn't that what ALL PEOPLE pray? All people - yes - but not ALL SAINTS. I have to admit, I have prayed a lot of dumb prayers myself, and have struggled for many years to say smart prayers. What I'm going to tell you I have distilled from many years of mistakes and occasional successes. I, too, have been deceived in the past about prosperity and happiness and all that, and must admit, it is a complicated subject which requires supernatural discernment and insight. There are many questions I have raised here by saying these prayers are dumb. You ask, why dumb? And if these are dumb, what's smart?

Over the years as I studied prosperity and also the saints, it seemed to me there was a dichotomy. It isn't that prosperity - the philosophy of all things good - is bad in itself, it's the fact that people MISUNDERSTAND prosperity. If you pray for prosperity, you must always at all times remember that prosperity is YOUR SPIRITUAL PROSPERITY - YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD. Instead of getting into a long discourse on this now I will simply cut to the chase and give you the daily prayers I pray today, and how they work, and why they are THE HIGHEST PRAYERS YOU CAN PRAY. (I admit prayers are on all levels. Whatever level you pray on, that is the level that God will answer you.)

I pray thus:


You are thinking,

"This is crazy. I don't want to be in excruciating pain every day! I don't want to be martyred! I'm just a normal person who maybe isn't ready for something like that. Maybe in another lifetime, I'll get there, but not now. Why can't I just pray for normal happiness?"

Now I'll explain to you the result of my prayers. They are not what you think, and when I show you what results these prayers bring, you will see another picture entirely. For some years, I've been afraid to say these very prayers. You see, I once prayed them and God answered me LITERALLY. I said these prayers very seriously, the way that the saints did, and God gave me the GRACE OF MARTYRDOM. This martyrdom lasted eighteen years and the thought of it is so scary that I wouldn't want to go back to it. During these years my pain was the PAIN OF THE LOSS OF GOD. In the year 2000 that part of the grace ended, and the presence of God returned to me. I was told to be happy. But I wasn't quite sure what that meant, how I was supposed to feel, and what to pray for. So every day, I prayed for happiness, but my prayers were uncertain, as I wasn't sure what KIND of happiness I was supposed to be having. It took me a few years to sort this out, and now I understand.

The highest form of happiness is spiritual happiness. You cannot be spiritually happy, totally, until you are SPIRITUAL. Your thoughts and your feelings have to be SPIRITUAL. What is spiritual thoughts and feelings and spiritual happiness? It is YOUR SPIRIT. It is your relationship to God, SPIRIT TO SPIRIT. The great secret is that I was not supposed to change at all. I had once asked for the Cross, and it martyred me. But now, I must still love Him and Him crucified, because I still have a body. THAT BODY STANDS BETWEEN ME AND GOD, ME AND HAPPINESS. THAT BODY MUST BE DEAD, AND IT'S FEELINGS DEAD, AND IT'S THOUGHTS DEAD, IN ORDER FOR ME TO BE SPIRITUALLY ONE WITH GOD. TO BE GOD'S INSTRUMENT, TO BE ONE, MEANS I HAVE NO WILL OF MY OWN, BUT ONLY SURRENDER TO GOD'S WILL, AND ONLY DO WHAT GOD WANTS ME TO DO, AND TRUST THAT GOD WILL TAKE CARE OF ME AND PROVIDE FOR ME AND ALSO, AS A RESULT OF THIS RELATIONSHIP, I HAVE TOTAL SECURITY AND TOTAL HAPPINESS BECAUSE I AM IN THE CRADLE OF LOVE.

If this sounds too high minded to you, I will explain it in a few ways. First, I ask the Lord for His Crown of Thorns. What affect does this have on me? As his "thorns" go into my head, they are a spiritual power that enters my head. I must understand, I will not be martyred twice, because I already received the grace. I will not die the same death again as I did in the Divine Stigmata. Now, something else will happen. I MUST TRUST GOD that a NEW GRACE IS TAKING PLACE. (For those who have not received the Stigmata, I cannot explain the effect these prayers would have on you. You have to experiment for yourself.) This new grace RIVETS MY MIND IN WISDOM. It MAKES ME SEE reality, truth. It makes me see the superficiality of what's going on around, and what might be going on inside me. It makes me see the difference between superficial nonsense; ego bunk and instict drives, and makes me live past it. I am on the higher bough. I am on top of the palm tree, looking down at the world. I look through the eyes of the Witness Consciousness, the Spirit Atman within me. I am above myself. I am not the flesh; I am the REAL ME. Only in being the real me can I be happy, because being false, fake, and playing a role cannot make me happy. But resting in Reality, God, Truth, can and does make me happy. It is HERE that JESUS is. It is HERE that Jesus TAUGHT ME TO BE. It is HERE that I am ONE WITH HIM. IT IS "HIM AND HIM CRUCIFIED" THAT I WANT.

Next, I mention His wounds of the hands. These hands that only gave Love and wanted to give more, were stopped. He could not, with those hands, give any more love. Now I look at my hands. I cannot give my spiritual love to any more people, either, because THEY DON'T WANT IT. They want my body, they want my money, they want my strength or time to help them with physical problems; but they don't want my spiritual love or presence. So they have done to me what they did to Jesus. They have nailed my hands to the Cross. This is good. This prevents me from wasting my time in intercourse with people on the lower levels. I will stay on the Cross, and if anyone wants my spiritual love, I will reach them from there. (Don't hold your breath, lady. One person out of thousands will even THINK about spiritual love.)

Now the wounds of the feet. I once went about doing good. Deeds not as great as those of Jesus, but I was a do gooder. Jesus did monumental good deeds. That was all He did. But they stopped Him. They stopped His mission when they nailed His feet to the Cross. He couldn't go anywhere any more. He had walked, with those Sacred Feet, all over Galilee, and He would walk no more. I have also stopped doing my good deeds, because they were not grateful. Now, I am nailed. I accept it. Stop those good deeds and just surrender to God. Let God work through you. Do nothing alone, nothing you think is good. Just stay home, be alone, pray, work on your site. Type articles. Because God wants me to reach more people and people who want what I have. It's like advertising. You look all over town for a friend, but can't find one. You start advertising in personals, and sooner or later, you find one. You have to reach more people. When you do things God's way, you'll reach more people and the right people, instead of spinning your wheels all over town. I must wait on God. I must trust God. I must stop my anxiety and LET GOD TAKE OVER. I MUST ACCEPT THOSE NAILS IN MY FEET, AS WELL AS IN MY HANDS. ACCEPTANCE BRINGS PEACE, AND PEACE BRINGS HAPPINESS. If I DO NOT accept these nails, I keep walking, searching for something to do, searching for relationships with people that will bring me happiness. These nails stop that. I accept the fact that I am on the Cross, with Him. I cannot go anywhere seeking human love any more. I am dead, nailed to the Cross. It is FINISHED.

Now a word about other religions. Both Yoga and Buddhism teach the same thing; that you must rise above yourself into the Spirit, deny your lower instincts and aspirations to find Oneness with God. THIS IS EXACTLY THE SAME AS THE CROSS. Up there, hands and feet nailed and all the other cruelty that was done, you are not going to have any desires of the flesh! It's over. It was your YEARNINGS, AMBITIONS for love, fame and fortune and so on, which got you into trouble in the first place. Wanting to be loved, by other people, is the source of probably the worst pains and aches of anything else on earth. It's for this love, and also comfort, that people work their fingers to the bone and also lie, cheat, steal and go to jail for. It is the source of all desires and pains. Once this is gone, there is peace. But it's not an empty peace. It's a peace like the grave where the body is dead, but the SOUL IS RESURRECTED.

I ask for the STRIPES. These could be the slanders, the hate, hostility, envy and jealousy, judgement and condemnation that I have received from others most of my life. They torture Truth. They HATE Truth because it isn't in them. If Truth is in you - really in you - but not in others, they are going to Scourge you. Scourging could also represent what they did to other saints. Some they pierced with arrows, some they skinned alive, some they stretched on racks, some they burned to death,
some they pierced and stabbed. Some they threw to the lions, and into pits, some they stoned, and received many other atrocities. Now most people are not saints. Most of us are not suffering for what we believe; our religion. But if you are a person of higher morals and those of lower morals, or lack of truth, punish you, then you are, in a sense, being punished for your religion. That is, if you are righteous and others want you to be like them and be liars, cheaters, stealers and insensitive to the needs of others; and they punish you for being stubborn in sticking to Truth, then they are punishing you for believing in righteousness. People are torturers. They will especially target the righteous because the righteous are not on the broad highway to Hell where most other people are going, and they stand out on that tight little path they walk, and other people hate them because they make other people look bad. These are the ones that are scourged. What is GOOD about the scourging, what I receive when I PRAY to stay in touch with the scourging, is that I REMEMBER WHO I AM. I AM ONE WITH GOD, NOT ONE WITH THEM. I MUST STAY WHO I AM; KEEP MY IDENTITY, AND NOT GO INTO THE MELTING POT OF SINNERS. In the scourging I ACCEPT calumny, defamation, impeachment of character, and I stay alone if no one will have me. I do not lower myself to cretans to be one with their universe. If I have to act like them to be with them, I stay alone. As I accept the scourging, I accept the evil that is forced upon me. I do not become angry and bitter, nor do I pine for their acceptance. I understand that THEY MUST REJECT ME, and it is good that they do. This is the way God wants me. I don't want to be like them. I want to remain a good Yogi, a good Buddhist and a good Christian.

The prayer for the scourging is part of the prayer that sets me free and lets me find comfort and rest only in God.

About the wound on the left shoulder Jesus had that no one knew about; I learned this through Anne Catherine Emmerich, the mystic who wrote the Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ. What is this secret wound and what power does it give me now?
This secret wound is the secret pain I have of hardships that no one knows about. It's about what I have suffered that was not part of my karma or a punishment for sins, but hardships that might be unfair or unwarranted. Most of us don't know what others go through, anyway. We think we have it hard, and everyone else has it easy. Not so; all humans suffer, from the highest to the lowest. The lowest SOMETIMES suffer less than the highest. God alone knows what is in everyone's hearts. For me, my secret wound or wounds is probably MISUNDERSTANDING. I think many people could say they've been misunderstood. I know people have misunderstood me because they didn't take THE TIME it would take to get to know me or even THINK about me but they judged me quickly, instantly, and without evidence. I MUST ACCEPT THIS. The power of this secret wound is that it once again sets me free from people where I rest only in God who alone compassionates me and gives me unconditional love. God is All!

Now the FINAL BLOW - the SPEAR in the HEART. As I pray for this (and I did not pray for this for a few years because I already have the wound and shuddered that it's effects would return to me. I wasn't trusting God, because I didn't understand that all these wounds, and this final one that is so near and dear to me, would MANIFEST IN A NEW WAY.) This terrible wound is the PAIN OF REJECTION. Although ALL the wounds signify rejection, this one especially symbolizes it. It is the CENTER OF YOUR BEING and therefore, the CENTER OF YOUR PAIN. It is your FEELING CENTER, in particular, the center where you FEEL LOVE. Your LOVE is rejected. What happens here as I receive this Stigmata again?What happens is that I COME CLOSER TO HIM, TO JESUS, AND THEREFORE, TO GOD. What is the sensation or the consciousness of this closeness? I RECEIVE VISION. Many people WANT TO KNOW how to receive VISION. They WANT THE POWER but they don't want the suffering that gets you there. People want to put out a shingle, a signpost, that says they have superior wisdom. They see something others do not. They're psychic, they're intuitive, they're prophets. But to be GIFTED that way, you have to live the life of a prophet or a saint. Their lives were harder than anyone elses. They were the most HATED people in town (and still are) because they were STUBBORN against evil. They were and are TARGETS of the devil, and therefore, of people. (Because the devil works most effectively through others.) There is A PRICE TO PAY FOR WISDOM. Here I am not talking about the CHEAP PSYCHICS who only READ YOUR MIND. (By cheap I do not mean financially cheap, as they are expensive. I mean spiritually cheap.) The price is just what I have told you.

This last prayer - the acceptance of the worst and biggest pain of all, is the pain of REJECTION. If you THINK about the rejection you have suffered and pine away for the love of people, you will continue to suffer in the flesh, and in the psyche. But if you relinquish your desire and accept that YOU ARE NOT WANTED - PERHAPS YOUR LOWER SELF IS WANTED, YOUR BODY, OR WHAT YOU HAVE IS WANTED, YOUR THINGS AND YOUR CONTACTS, BUT YOU, YOURSELF, ARE NOT WANTED. Jesus was not wanted at the end. No matter what He had done, the world at large did not want him. And the world at large will not want you. If only a handful of lovers appreciates you, you must accept that gladly. God is not mean and will not leave you with no one. Jesus had His Mother, Mary Magdalene, John the Beloved, and the Holy Women. Trust that God will not leave you completely alone. The people you want may not want you, but you will have someone.

These SMART PRAYERS (and all the Saints prayed this way and still do) bring much joy, peace, and closure to me. I silence my anxiety. I stop asking WHY. (Why is there evil? Why did Hitler kill the Jews?...because there is the devil, and people who listen to him. Because evil exists and I do not have to answer for it. I only have to answer FOR MY OWN SINS.)

Now, all my enemies have receeded from my thoughts. I have silenced them because I no longer care about what was done to me. I am dead, on the Cross. I am with Him. There is a good view here.

From this HIGH PLACE I am above their evil and my own evil. I no longer WANT the world, the flesh and the devil. I only want God. It is in this position, this placement, that God begins pouring out to me the ABUNDANCE OF GRACE. Before, it was PIECEMEAL because I surrendered in part. Now I am ALL GOD'S. Suddenly, my mind opens. I see and understand mysteries I never understood before. VISION COMES FROM CHARITY. IN GIVING ALL OF MYSELF, I BECAME TOTALLY CHARITABLE. NOW I CAN RECEIVE ALL FROM GOD.

These are smart prayers. To those who pray the lower form of prayers; all prayers are answered. Muktananda told this story. Everyone went to a shrine of a Holy Siddha Saint. A couple went because they were childless and wanted a baby. A man was going to court and wanted to win a lawsuit. College students went to meet their lovers.

Muktananda went because he wanted God. Each person got what they prayed for.


Rasa Von Werder, August 2004






If you want to help souls in Purgatory, say these prayers daily. The first comes from St. Gertrude the Great; the next two I invented myself. After saying these prayers, I always talk to my three guardian angels, who call themselves the “three wise men.” I add any other prayers I have time for, such as invoking all the saints and thanking God for all Her goodness.

First Prayer:

Mother God, please take all the Masses being said on earth today and every day and receive them for the debt of the souls in Purgatory.

Second Prayer:

Mother God, please receive today all the pains, the sufferings, the anxiety and depression, the hurts and fears, the accidents and sicknesses, the failures and disappointments, in union with Jesus and Mary and all the saints, and in the company with the Holy Angels, and receive this as payment for the debt of the souls in Purgatory – of all religions.

Third prayer:

Mother God, please receive today all the love on earth, and all the mercy and forgiveness, all the kindness and virtue, all the good deeds and sacrifices and prayers, united with Jesus and Mary and all the saints of all religions, in company with the Holy Angels, and receive this in payment for the debt of the souls in Purgatory.


Prayer given to RVW in 1981 as a request for a prayer to Jesus equivalent to the Hail Mary:







© 2004 - 2006 RASA VON WERDER